Brendan had botox injections yesterday. I think this is the 7th time but honostly I have lost count. We used to go to Boston for Botox but recently have became involved with an amazing neurologist here in RI. She is one of the only Dr.'s in our state who administers the botox and she has been extremely helpful over the past year. Brendan was very nervous days prior to his injections. This was the very first time he was anxious about going to the hospital. He is getting older and understands everything. He also listens to EVERYTHING anyone is saying and sometimes I am not mindful of that. He does well once you explain everything to him. I think he was nervous because just 6 months ago he went to the hospital for botox injections, double eye surgery, and an echocardiogram. I am sure he remembers that day!
He is put under anesthesia for the procedure which always has me on pins and needles until he is awake. I think that was his 11th time being under and it NEVER gets any easier. I really need to remember he vomits after anesthesia and not while he is in the hospital....oh no....it has to be on the drive home! Yes he had juice and banana all over himself, his booster seat, and my van. Oh Brendan. He tried to get it into this miniscule bin they gave him to hold. I am pretty sure not even a drop made it in. But what can you do. My husband cleaned the car while I cleaned Brendan, his booster, and winter jacket. :)
He was out of it for a few hours and all he wanted to do was eat! He snapped out of it after a popsicle and then ate all of his soup. He was back to himself 3 hours after he woke up so that was nice. He is very loose which is always strange. I can swing him around my hip with ease to carry him around. He also had some injections in his right arm and pecs which makes getting a shirt on and off a breeze! Too bad they didn't stay like that forever but I'll take it. We can work on range of motion and building muscle mass and more control over the next few months. He seems to always improve!
Thankfully for us Botox works for Brendan. We just don't know how much longer it will. He is a troooper as he always is and he keeps on going day by day wihout ever asking WHY? He just doesn't know yet that not every child goes through what he goes through and I will keep it that way for as long as I can.
I always wonder how much more I can endure. I will never know that answer I assume. He needs hip surgery to remove some screws in the very near future and then he will need a sedated heart cath which will reveal what needs to be done to close those stubborn holes in his heart. I may know how much I can handle if they tell me my boy will require open heart surgery. I may need a therapist at that point! But for now I will keep my head high and try and keep those tears away because we made it through another stressful day.
It was Thanksgiving day back in 2002. I was only 23 years old and my life forever changed on that day. I had a placental abruption and Brendan was born at 33 weeks. He lost oxygen during delivery due to incompetent care but was a fighter and turned 17 this year. My journey in life over the past 17 years took many turns I was not expecting but I try to stay strong and have my husband by my side even when I am not.