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Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Happy Birthday Brendan!! Missing my Dad

Brendan turned 9 years old yesterday!! Every year seems to fly by. I can not believe he is 9 and next year we hit double digits!! I am not ready for the next 9 years. He is heading into his teenage years. That seems insane!! Okay I know I have a few more years before that but lately he is maturing before my eyes and becoming this young boy that I never thought I would see.

He loved his birthday. We had a family party and he had a blast. He can open presents without any help now...must have the been all those years of practice. I think this was his first birthday that he genuinely enjoyed all of his gifts. Usually we don't even open half of them for weeks because he shows no interest but every single present has been opened and played with.

Maybe we are all learning who Brendan really is or maybe he is just becoming more 'typical' as he ages. I am not sure but I am loving this little boy that is growing up on me. He can play by himself in his room. He watches t.v. in bed and can actually have the remote within reach and NOT press a million buttons. He even shuts off his t.v. by himself when he is ready for bed. The past year has been really humbling for me. So many changes. So many good things. I am so impressed by my own son and I know part of that is due to our parenting and helping him become who he is today and part of that is his determination to be like everyone else.

Before my dad passed away he told me I was doing a great job with Brendan and he knew I had a difficult life. He told me he was proud of me which he never really said to me throughout my life. I am thankful for the last conversations we had. They really helped me let him go. I miss him and these holiday's are not easy. I know my mom must be having a very hard time. I know everything will get less painful as the years go on but right it is very painful. I cried while making apple pie for Thanksgiving because a few months ago my dad told me he meant to text me to tell me how good my apple pie was in hopes that I would make him one. Well I am glad I did make him his very own the next time I went to visit. The little things just pop up and bring sadness to me. I hope that fades. It is hard to even see a picture of him or think of him without crying. I know it has only been 2 1/2 months but it seems like yesterday he was still with us. RIP Dad.


Amy said...

Oh my goodness Stephanie, my heart aches for your loss of your Dad. I will say some extra prayers for you this holiday season. My grandmother passed away earlier this year too, and she was a lot like my second mother. Not having her here for the holidays is tough. I can empathize with you just a bit. I know that it must be harder when it is your dad. I got very emotional when I read what your dad said about how he was proud of your for the great job you are doing with Brendan. I know that had to mean so very much to you. It is true. You are doing a wonderful job, and that is so obvious in how Brendan is growing and changing.

I just keep getting more and more impressed with Brendan the more I learn about him. I pray that Emma will become more typical like Brendan as time goes on. He can do so many wonderful things that Emma cannot even think about doing right now.

I especially LOVED LOVED LOVED his new picture on the slide. He looks fantastic and so grown up in that photo. He certainly inspires me.

Hugs! I will be thinking of you through the holidays. I wish you peace and happiness.

jenny said...

happy birthday brendan wow time flies lol just over the past few months ive been with u here on his blog he has changed so much i am so sorry about the loss of your dad you will be in my thoughts and prayers this holliday season hugs tto you and apple pie is my favorite lol

We take it day by day said...

Thanks ladies. I feel like Brendan has come so far over the past few months. I seriously think PERCS is one of that reason. That surgery has changed his life.

Thank you for the sympthy for my dad. It is so hard and his death was long and drawn out especially with his heart issues the past two years. It was just a very somber time and then it ended so badly. I feel so bad he had to go like he did. I am so glad to have 3 amazing kids that keep me going and smiling and laughing all the time. :)

Sheila said...

Happy Belated Birthday, Brendan! I can't get over how grown up he looks in that picture! Wow! Brendan is such an inspiration to me and he gives me great hope for Malayna's future.

I'm sorry to hear you're feeling sad. Losing a parent is SO hard but it does get easier with time. But there will always be those certain things that get to you so hang in there. Holidays are especially challenging so I'm really glad you have your husband and kids to keep your spirits up.

April said...

So grateful for this progress. I also feel for you though... because I know what it's like to not have a close relative to celebrate them with.